...feeling scared, crying uncontrollably, shaking and terrified to death, hoping he would not find me.  My father's rage was out of control intoxicated with drugs and alcohol.  In the closet I hid myself with clothes covering me, hoping that I'm well hidden.  This time my plan worked and I managed to escape my father's out of control rage.  However, there have been numerous of times I wasn't so lucky.

...when the knock came to my door, and as I opened the door, I didn't realize he was drunk.  When he stepped inside the stench of alcohol was radiating off of him and that was when I decided he had to leave.  As I told him he had to leave, he held me tighter and tighter.  Tugging with this six feet two inch - three hundred pound man became harder for my five feet five inch body to deal with.  I became weaker and weaker unable to push him off of me.  His strength was over powering me.  I began to cry and scream - hoping that he would get off of me and leave me alone.  As he finish raping me, I felt so violated and hurt.

....seeing and experiencing abuse for all of my childhood, I was determined not to  marry an abuser like my mother did.  At the age of 21, I decided to marry the man I fell in love with - thinking that we would be together forever.  The engagement process was so wonderful, full of gifts, cards, and I love you' s.  After three years of being engaged, I decided to get married not realizing that my life would never be the same again.  After having my first child from this marriage, that's when the abuse started.  It became settle and eventually became physical.  Ending the marriage after 7 years, I did not realize  I would have more abusive relationships.  After experiencing several failed abusive relationships, that was when I decided to  get professional help out of desperation.

.....as I walked into this church one beautiful Sunday morning, everyone seemed to be so happy and the pastor was preaching a powerful message.  As I went back again,  I felt loved and accepted I decided to join the church.  As weeks went by,  I noticed everyone was always at the church and no one seemed to ever go home.  The pastor, I thought to be  loving and kind turned out to be very manipulating and controlling.  He wanted the members to be there 24 hours a day and demanded that they be there.  If they refused, he went into a rage that caused fear within the members which caused them not to confront him.  As my time came to confront the pastor about my family being there 24 hrs a day, he became so furious that he wanted to fight me.  He stood up in front of me using his posture to try to intimidate me.  I realized that I was not getting anywhere with him,  and if I continued to talk I new he  would of harmed me, so I became very silent not saying a word.  He eventually calmed down.  After this meeting was over, me and my family left this church organization and never returned again.

Dating Abuse: Any unwanted or forced sex.  Any unwanted kiss or hug that is taken without your consent.

Emotional Abuse: Causing any emotional pain or stress intentionally.  Depriving and withholding love or any acts of kindness as a way to punish you. Mean looks or gestures to intimidate you.

Marital Abuse:  Mind games, conditional love, hitting, punching, pouting, and the silent treatment.

Personal / Property Abuse: Destroying your property or anything you hold in high value.  Going through your purse, pockets or wallet without your consent.

Physical Abuse:  Any physical attack that is done to the body that causes any type of pain.  Any physical attack that is done to the body that leaves a mark, scar or bruise.

Spiritual / Ministry Abuse:  Being apart of any church or religious group that uses scripture to manipulate and control.  Your independence they will not support or encourage.  Taking finances for selfish reasons and never giving it to the widows, orphans and the poor within the organization.  Favoring or highly esteeming others in the organization more then others.

Verbal Abuse: Any verbal attack to cause private or public humiliation.  Using bad names, cursing or swearing to cause fear.  Loud talking and pointing of the finger to belittle you.